Maybe you’re having a moment of self doubt. That critic might be creeping in and sometimes it can be hard to keep it at bay. But, let’s get down to the facts: you’ve survived every tough perhaps heart wrenching moment in you’re life. You survived yesterday and you’re surviving today one moment at a time. Let’s take a moment to celebrate your triumphs. Try to remember, you are enough as you are.
≜ "Pain travels through families until someone is ready to feel it" ≜
Intergenerational trauma is trauma that is passed down from one generation of survivors to the next generation and perhaps beyond. It lives in our dreams, subconscious and sometimes conscious minds. This trickle down effect deeply impacts lives in a profound way. Some examples of intergenerational trauma are but are not limited to: slavery, the Holocaust, domestic violence, sexual abuse, veterans, racism, and poverty. How is this trauma transferred? Originally it was thought that trauma was transferred through child rearing but now it has been discovered that trauma is passed down epigenetically. Sometimes it can feel like a lot to hold our ancestors stories and our own. In what ways do your ancestors impact you today?
This summer, in addition to private practice I worked for Fiddleheads a social-emotional wellness camp for kids (5-8yrs) who've encountered trauma, kids with autism, and kids with sensory processing disorder's. Fiddlehead is a nature camp and this year we were based in the Presidio, hiking through red woods and playing in the sand. I learned so much from these kiddos and loved working with them! At camp, we taught mindfulness, social-emotional regulation and tolerance. As you can see in the picture some days we were even lucky enough to listen to guitar!
Most of us are familiar with the idiom, "All good things must come to an end". This quote comes from Geoffrey Chaucer an English author from the 1300's and the line was first seen in his poem, "Troilus and Crisyede" outlining the falling out of two lovers in ancient Troy.
Although an old idiom, the feeling of good things ending or perhaps fear, a warning, or regret of losing a positive moment in time affects us all. This often occurs when relationships end or friendships are lost.
Another way for us to look at this is to frame endings as a new opening or healing a part of ourselves that no longer requires that person's presence in our life. This is often a new ripe space for further growth and renewal.
We may cherish friendships and relationships that have dwindled yet simultaneously honor our growth and potential for new harmony and connection.
“Be a rainbow in someone else’s cloud”
This quote rings so true; according to science doing kind acts for others genuinely makes you happier. Cooperation or generosity activates a part of the brain called the striatum. This area of the brain responds to rewards like good food, a hot shower, or doing kind acts for others. The striatum releases what is called “warm glow” or positive energy with reward activation.
SF Therapist, originally an East Coast native. I have been in the mental health field for 12 years. Check out my stories on Instagram at @femme.trauma.therapist !